Extreme Extremists (Non-UKIP Edition)

Last Thursday was not only the high point of the legacy parties' whining about the supposed extremism of UKIP, it was also the first anniversary of this.

If David Cameron had devoted half as much energy to denouncing those guys as he did to calling UKIPers fascists, there probably wouldn't have been a UKIP surge to get all foot stampey about in the first place.

UKIP vs FSA

With the polls due to open in a few hours, it looks like being a straight up UKIP vs FSA fight. That's FSA as in the 'Free...Stuff Army'.

Yeah, 'Stuff', that's it.

Despite the heroic efforts of White Dee and the rest of Benefits Street, they're no match for the professionals. Literally professionals, as in all the living dead making a comfortable middle class living off of jobs with titles like Eco Justice Gay Cycling Coordinator. Lump together the salary, gold plated pension and other benefits and it's no wonder they've put aside their petty differences - and principles - to come together and defend their fundamental human right to keep their hands in the public's pocket.

Consider their twin kings aka the Two Chrises. On the right, sort of, there's Chris Patton, last elected in 1987 (and de-elected in 1992), but you can't keep a bad man down and so he's been binging at the trough ever since. From the People's Party, there's Chris Smith, Islington-based theatre aficionado and so therefore the obvious choice to run the Environment Agency.

Tory Chris's stint with the BBC's Board of Governance will best be remembered for the complete collapse of anything resembling actual governance, even to the point of people leaving with massive payoffs and no record of who authorised them. Meanwhile, Labour Chris sunk Somerset. Then again, who cares? The FSA is all about having the right attitudes, actual achievement is purely optional.

Say what you like about The Smartest PM Ever, and I usually do, but at least he understands his target market. Hold up a paper hastag? Sure, why not? Actually, doing stuff would mean taking a position, making moral judgements - you know, crazy UKIP talk. If there's one thing that links Cameron, the FSA and White Dee, it's the certainty that work is for chumps.

Alternative Culture Update

I'm shocked - shocked - to find drugs involved in this incident.

Nevertheless, I am quite sure that if you don't think guys like this are the modern incarnations of Wordworth and Shelley then you're *still* a really huge raaycist!

Just Say No...

.... to liberal bullying. Why don't more people do this?

This is why I can't get excited about Levenson. Outrageous though the Levnson reforms are, it's not like our supposedly unregulated press would ever hire a lass like this even now. Just like the philosopher and the actress, they've already agreed to be the government's whore, now they're just quibbling over price.

Maybe He Was Confused About The Whole 'Fraud Squad' Thing...

Hard to believe, but the Nigel Evans Show wasn't the strangest recent case involving Lancashire Police and a gay dude.

In an interview with his local paper, [Richard Kennedy] said: 'I heard a group of men shouting homophobic abuse at me. 'The next thing I know I was punched in the back of the head. I was violently assaulted - all because of my sexuality. 'I was covered in blood and had my face stamped on, causing my teeth to go into my gums. I might need surgery to amend the damage done. It’s absolutely disgraceful to violently attack someone because of who they are.' Kennedy went on: 'From all of this, all I want is awareness...I want people to see what can happen if you are as stupid as me to be alone on a night out'.

Yes, indeed, a fairly typical case of homophobic violence - which is to say, a hoax.

But today the teenager, who studies Contemporary Theatre and Performance at the University of Central Lancashire, admitted he made it all up.

Oh, my!

It takes more than being exposed as a Big Fat Liar to hash his mellow though:

After being shown CCTV of him tripping and falling, face-first, onto the pavement, Kennedy accepted that the 'utterly inhumane homophobic attack' he had talked about actually never happened.

Much as Bernie Madoff accepted that his bookkeeping wasn't all it could be, no doubt. Then again, who can blame him for his arrogance? It's not like he was going to face any consequences, was it?

Detective Inspector Paddy O’Neill said:... 'Having had oversight of the investigation... I accept his report was made in good faith.'

Say what?

This wasn't a guy who woke up with a bad case of UDI (Unidentified Drinking Injury) and decided to spin a heroic tale about it in the SU bar afterwards. He made an official complaint, complete with a graphic tale of violence, and triggered a police investigation. That's the very definition of wasting police time.

More to the point, was his tale of crazed homophobes meant to encourage community cohesion and mutual respect? Hell, no. In so far as it was a classic attempt to smear, mostly Christian, social conservatives it was what the left used to call 'Hate Speech', until approximately two seconds ago.

All of which is to return to the usual point: stop giving leftists the benefit of the doubt. This case isn't about noble intentions gone wrong, it was a set up right from the off and now everyone can see how corrupt the left is.

The Snake Is Eating Itself

Uh oh.... it's a showdown in Shakedown City.

This trough ain't big enough for the both of them.

Actually, my sympathies are with Mr C, and not only because, if he's like 90% of footballers, his ego probably is big enough to think he should be King of the World. There's also that other thing: Lord who? 

At least Campbell really did climb to the top of his profession. What did m'lud do exactly?

I mean, aside from industrial-scale race-hustling, obviously.

Yeah, About That 'Nigel Farage Affair' Thing....

Hey, and I thought the usual suspects wanted us to be more mature, sophisticated and continental about these things....

Has anyone heard from Hugh Grant and Steve Coogan yet?

Honestly, it's like Lord Levenson never existed. Meanwhile, here are three things the MSM won't be asking:

i/ Bearing in mind that the UKIP vs the legacy parties stand off is meant to be a battle between a bunch of jovial morons and the sophisticated intellectuals of the political classes, it's noticeable which side is making substantive points and which is acting like a cut-price version of the News of the World, frantically searching through bins to try and find something incriminating.

 ii/ What exactly is the overlap between all those feminists outrageously outraged by Godfrey 'Sluts' Bloom and the people right now claiming that the only possible reason an attractive women could hold a senior position in UKIP is that she's banging the boss?

iii/ How does this sudden love for traditional values square with the whole gay marriage thing? Eighteen months ago anyone talking about the sanctity of marriage was a crazed bigot who wanted to lynch interior designers, now the MSM is going all misty-eyed about the state of Holy Matrimony.

Hey, it's not just the obvious hypocrisy, this is a perfect insight into the essential corruption of Cameronism. When Cameron and the rest of his elitist pals are sneering at traditional values, that's proof of their sophistication, but they still expect everyone else to stay on the plantation. That's why they complain endlessly about welfare fraud and tax avoidance even as they use taxpayer-funded quangos as a full employment service for their mates.

Smart Vs Stupid: Which Is Better?

MSM Status: Genius

MSM Status: Moron

There's a serious point here - apart from 'never trust the MSM's opinion on anything' - our governing class's definition of genius is entirely self-serving to the point of tautology. Hunt is the perfect embodiment of the post-modern, triangulating, 'knows all 58 genders options in facebook' political luvvie. Of course his fellow passengers on the gravy train have hailed his brilliance . You'd get more sense asking Premiership footballers if they think Wayne Rooney is overpaid.

And that's how Britain ended up with a supposed genius who doesn't understand how contracts work. These people deal in attitudes not actual policies. No wonder they're so completely thrown by Putin. Doesn't that guy know he's wrecking his chances of getting a sympathetic profile in the Guardian? 

It says a lot about where British politics is at that our ruling class are baffled by a politician who means what he says. Meanwhile, in so far as the dumb housewife from the snowy wasteland called it all perfectly, the question has to be asked: who are the insular, inbred hicks now, huh? 

Conspiracy Nuts FTW!

As I understand it, the latest iteration of Harriet Harperson's position is that she was working for the NCCL when they were coordinating with a paedophile group but she somehow missed the open references to legalising child abuse: in other words, she wasn't at the meeting, she was with the meeting.

To which all I can say is 'how about that paedo panic, huh'?

Yes, normal caveats apply. Spending £14 bazillion to put Basil Brush on trial for supposedly touching someone's bottom in 1974 is insane, but the people Harperson was working with were the real deal.

Ditto, while 'road to Damascus' conversions do happen, they do require you to admit that you were on the way there in the first place, rather than claim you were just taking the scenic route to Cairo.

As it is, for all Harperson might claim she didn't know nuffink guv, there is a common thread between what the NCCL believed back then, and what the same people believe right now. That's why this is such a key issue for conservatives, not just because the harassment and interdiction of paedophiles is the right thing to do (though it is) or because it's a winning issue politically (also true) but because it's a perfect insight into the left's MO.

Round around 1990 the left suddenly decided to start claiming that they totally hated paedos too, but they just wanted to fine tune things. They tried to claim they were Barnes Wallace to our Bomber Harris but the trouble was the more time went by without any actual dams being busted, the more obvious it was that these guys were all a bit Neville Chamberlain.

The rhetoric might have changed but the theme was still the same: rigid opposition to anything common sense would suggest as a way to make life harder for paedophiles. Consider this: for all the supposed excesses of the 'paedo panic' these guys can never name a case where they think the law was excessively savage to a bona fide, actual predator. It's always some guy who should never have been convicted anyway. Meanwhile, us knuckle-dragging rightists can name a barrel load of case where savages were let loose to strike again - like this:

Michael Clark, 40, was on the Sex Offenders Register and subject to official checks. But he was able to move into a city of his choosing where neighbours did not know his past.

The council considered him too dangerous to live there, but had to house him after being warned of legal action for breaching his human rights as a homeless person.

If the left could ever show as direct a connection between CO2 and climate change as the right can show between elitist liberals and murder, every conservative in the country would be biking to work. Meanwhile, the left regards a few dead bodies as the cost of doing business, but pouts and whines about 'smears' when anyone calls them out on it. 

Reality Still Has The Casting Vote

Bad as events are in Somerset, at least it's not happening in Bengal or Sligo in the 19th Century. If it had, lefties would still be writing books, plays and operas about the eviiiillll English Lord who let people's houses get flooded just so he could make the place nice for the birdies.

They should have told Lord Smith that the birds voted conservative. He'd have been hunting them down himself with a shotgun.

As it is the main question is what will happen first: the floods going down or the BBC finding a way to call Smith a right-winger. On the plus side, while Somerset is flooded, The Dave's credibility has been sunk too.

We're back to the two foundational myths of Daveism. We're told that he is a brilliant manager and a master politician. Now he's facing a political crisis caused in large part by letting a government agency go bananas, and not just through indolence but also as a matter of policy. The Cameroonatics pride themselves on their post-ideological, post-modern, ironic detachment. People with actrual convictions were dismissed as dullsville bores and accused of 'banging on' about stuff. Why bring everyone down and hash their mellow by arguing over actual policy?

That's how we ended up with a conservative PM happy to preside over a government agency headed by an Islington liberal and staffed entirely by ecoloons (but at least we've found one context where liberals think diversity is overrated). 

It turns out that ideas still matter, after all. Culture War matters. Allowing econuts to take over a government agency turns out to have been a disaster. Lives have been lost and homes wrecked as a result of allowing Metropolitan liberals to use a large part of England as a giant econut version of Sim City. If the Tories don't stand against that, in what sense are they conservative?

Reminder: Liberal Multi-Culturalism Is (Still) A Fraud

All true, and doncha just know that this guy was one of them that waxes lyrical about how vibrant and exciting these Third World hell holes are. So much more lifey than dullsville Britain!

But only if you don't have to deal with the realities of life in an Islamicaly-challenged hole. Obviously.

In other words, these guys love of multiculuralism rests on the idea that the rest of the world is just a more exotic version of Guildford. They're not actually open to other cultures at all, they're open to their own culture but in a different accent. Meanwhile, us judgemental right wing nuts at least give foreigners the courtesy of dealing with them on their own terms, instead of treating them like Guardian readers with a taste for flamboyant rhetoric.

It remind me of one of those 'Commencement Addresses' that was bouncing round the internet a few years ago, the one where the speakers tells the kids 'of course your parents are boring, they didn't used to be that way, but then they had to take care of you'. Britain is boring too, and that's why we have things like have actual ambulances.

Just In Case You Ever Though PC Was Class War By Other Means...

How very dare a mere serf not treat the death of the Greatest Man Ever with the correct degree of respect!

Clearly they need a lesson in decorum from their betters!

I guess we'll have to file this under 'If Nigel Farage Had Done This...'

Fictional Character Threatened By Fictional Problem

Bad news everyone: a guy who dresses up and reads stuff off a script is warning about the dangers of ManBearPig.

 I got nuffink!

Seriously, this is the perfect example of Ann Coulter's line that the left's biggest advantage is their resistance to parody. How can you satirise this? It's like they've sucked all the stupid out of the room.

These are the guys who call the right ignorant morons but I don't notice any of us warning that if green taxes aren't cut, Santa won't be able to heat his house properly and he'll die of hypothermia... except that actually happens to people, unlike Gerbil Worming which, much like Santa on Christmas Eve, covers the whole planet without leaving a single trace of its existence.

It's The Future In HD

Yes, indeed, price hikes in fuel are all down to greedy capitalist pig dogs.

Ditto, poverty in retirement is all down to those meany insurance companies.

Likewise, the cost of legal advice is.... No, wait, it turns out that lawyers are hard working altruists and the government should just air drop blank cheques over Lincoln's Inn Fields until Hell freezes over. Still, that's obviously one of those cases where we just don't understand the nuance.

For every other line of business though, it's all aboard the John Galt Express to Caracas:

"I want a Sony plasma television for the house," said Amanda Lisboa, 34, a business administrator who waited seven hours outside a Caracas Daka store, similar to Best Buy. "It's going to be so cheap!"

What could possibly go wrong?

Just Saying...

Hey, wasn't it just a month ago that liberals were outrageously outraged that anyone could criticise a veteran?

BSc MONA Studies

Is this not the most perfect example of modern policing you've ever seen?

How about a bit less emphasis on 'feeling safe' and more on actually being safe? But no, wandering wound with a guy in a blue body suit is one thing, but actually releasing useful information is a little.... controversial.

Sauce For The Goose...

Don't be shocked, but the people who are freaked out by the idea that a country GP might want to own a target pistol think maniacs with guns are just loveable jack-the-lads.

Personally, I loved the bit where he claimed the family had no experience of the legal process.

Yeah, I'll bet.

 Not that it isn't always fun to see a member of the predator class whine about how they've lost their faith in the legal system, but I'm noticing a certain double standard here. The Scumbag In Question talks a lot about the truth, but never gets around to dealing with any actual 'facts'. You have to look elsewhere to see what they're really pushing:

In the months after his death Mr Duggan's family, along with the police and MPs, received an anonymous letter claiming Mr Duggan had been set up. Mr Underwood said: "That letter alleged that a Trident officer had hatched a plan with an informant to arrange for Mark Duggan to pick up the gun from Kevin Hutchinson-Foster. "The allegation was that the informant said he could persuade Mark Duggan to pick up the gun and then the police could catch him. "What the letter goes on to suggest was that that would lead to Mr Duggan being shot dead as anything less than doing that would reveal the identity of the informant."

He was set up by being forced to carry a illegal fire arm round with him. Hey, it could happen to anyone. Who hasn't been visiting a friend and had them say 'if you're going down town, can you drop this uzi off for me'?

 Still, since the Guardian is apparently taking seriously anonymous letters alleging huge conspiracies (which may or may not have copied in Messers Sue, Grabbit & Runne), I guess that means they can't really dispute intelligence reports so specific they even named the firearms supplier?

I mean, that is kind of the issue here: the utterly demented nature of the modern left, which wants us to believe any old nonsense put out there by violent thugs but disregard anything from anyone who might conceivably vote conservative.

Meanwhile, in related news, no one from this family has yet been offered a column in the Guardian.

Joe McCarthy Was Right

Like the Great Man said, if it was just stupidity, wouldn't random chance mean that these errors wouldn't always favour exactly the same cause?

Mind you, considering the demographic involved, 2000 non-existent people appearing from nowhere is standard practice. They're probably all on the electoral roll in Bradford.

They Can Give It Out....

Surely everyone now knows that member of thr Inner Party are not to be quizzed as though they were commoners?

No doubt this will be the next bogus scandal after the Twitter Wars. Meanwhile, don't hold your breath waiting to find out how many times during his tenure the BBC ran shows featuring alleged 'consumer' journalists ambushing small businessmen?

Liberal Outrage: You Can't Say That (But They Can)

Don't be shocked, but it turns out that our would-be Twitter Police are graduates of the Al Gore School of Leading By Example. Apparently, threats of sexual multilation and AIDS gags count as cutting edge humour, provided you're really in with the in crowd.

They're not even hiding it any more, they really are arguing that they can say things other people can't 'cause they're, like, licenced media people.

All of which makes this call for civility halfway between the Duke of Wellington complaining that railways will allow the working class to move around and a consortium of buggy whip makers calling for a clampdown on the anarchic world of automobile manufacturing.

It's the perfect example of how liberalism has gobbled up socialism. Here we have the party of the left giving house room to a bunch of absurdly well-connected members of the New Class complaining that they let anyone on the 'net these days.

It's the perfect example of the fraud of political correctness. PC was always about giving soi dissant socialists an alibi for sneering at the lower orders. Keeping up with the absurd PC euphemism d'jour is just the left's version of knowing which knife to use for the fish course. Being unconcerned about the impact of open borders on public services is their equivalent of the old aristocracy professing to know nothing about 'trade', such proletarian matters are simply beneath them, doncha'know?

For proof of all this, consider the Twitter Wars Bandwagon Jumper In Chief: Stella Creasy. She claims to be worried, shocked, appalled and worried again about fellow media luvvies facing rape threats on Twitter, but what happened when girls in Rochdale were facing real rapes? The Criminal Protection Service and the Police buried these cases and where was Stella? Chaining herself to the railings, or happy to climb aboard the Good Ship Diden C Nuffinkguv? Need you ask?

Stella's the fearless fighter against fantasy rapes, who doesn't want to know about real ones. Truly, she is a heroine for our times.