Wenches Witch Hunt Witch Hunter, Witch Hunter Whines

Shocking news everyone! Despite the ongoing purge of straight white guys, it turns out showbiz is not, in fact, a rainbow utopia after all. 

Bring out the nano violins, ready to play the saddest song ever:

Noel Clarke's twin Bafta statuettes sit on the bookshelves of his West London home. 

Once they represented the pinnacle of his achievement as an actor, writer, producer and director. Today the bronze faces stare blankly out over a career that lies in tatters.

Quick quiz: can you name the movies he got those awards for? 

Can anyone? 

He'd traced his roots in an episode of Who Do You Think You Are? and written and starred in the acclaimed Hood Trilogy of youth culture films, directing two of them

Yep, he's another black guy who makes programs about being a black guy. That's his whole thing. 

It was working as well:

Today he is a pariah after a string of highly damaging allegations led to the British Academy of Film and Television Arts suspending his membership, and withdrawing his 2021 Bafta award for outstanding contribution to British cinema just nine days after he was handed the coveted gong.

Outstanding contribution you guys! 

Yeah, I'd like to see the working out on that calculation. What are the odds that anyone in Bafta could explain just what was so 'outstanding' about it all? 

But the real problem with victimhood poker is that sometimes other players will call you out:

Clarke, 46, a married father-of-four, is accused of being a sexual predator and a bully. Allegations – made by more than 20 women and spanning a 15-year period – include claims of unwanted touching or groping, sexually inappropriate behaviour and comments on set, the covert filming of a naked audition and the sharing of explicit pictures without consent.

Clarke, who grew up in a tough and impoverished part of West London, vehemently denies the claims. He has not, he says, been granted the presumption of innocence, let alone a fair hearing.

So is he guilty? Maybe, maybe not, but in so far as these are specific allegations from actual, named people, they're at least 10,000 x more credible than the racial atrocity stories this grifter has built his career on. 

He acknowledges that not all of his past behaviour has been beyond reproach, particularly when events of almost two decades ago are judged by the standards of today.

Two decades ago. So, you know, 2002.

You remember the crazed, anything goes culture of the Blair years, right? 

We're not talking 'Life On Mars' territory here. 

Norwegian film producer Synne Seltveit claims that Clarke slapped her buttocks during a night out in Glasgow in 2015 and then later sent her an explicit picture via Snapchat.

On her first allegation, Clarke responds with a clear denial: 'I never slapped her bottom and would never have done that.'

But his response to her second allegation is less definite.

And really who amongst us can be expected to keep track of who we've sent pictures of our genitals to? 

Asked if he regrets this and wishes he had been more circumspect, he says again: '100 per cent.' Similarly, he concedes that he may have sometimes been 'over-tactile' but says he has never groped or tried to kiss a woman who 'didn't want to be kissed'.

Given that this is a guy who can't write a birthday card without including a scene where a hot, white girl jumps into bed with his character, I going to go out on a limb and suggest his definition of 'want' may be a little broad.

And that's the sauce for the goose aspect of it all. The law defines an incident as 'racist' if anyone believes it is racist. Crazy? Maybe, but that what it says. Meanwhile, we're apparently not allowed to ask if the complainants had anything in common? Say, ethnicity? 

It's probably nothing. 

A vote of thanks too for the feminists. They've spent decades claiming sexual harassment is about power not sex, now suddenly we have a race-obsessed nut who keeps getting involved in bizarre incidents with women of a certain ethnicity and they've taken a vow of silence. 

Everything is sexist, except for naked auditions which are totally a normal thing. 

Even now the race card is still working for him, it's just not working quite as well as before. Someone should have told him: When you play the game of victimhood, you win or you die!

Your Pay Hasn't Been 'Frozen' It's Just Held Up In Traffic By A Protest

Sometimes there is justice in the world... the very people who were delighted to use the Former World's Deadliest Virus as an excuse to harass anyone with an actual, productive job are now shocked - shocked - to find that the after-effects are hitting them in the pocket. 

Who knew that morally, legally and scientifically dubious lockdowns would impact on the public finances? 

Also shocking: it turns out that the entire human right lobby was not, in fact, wiped out by covid after all. They were just pining for the fjords while the Government used bogus figures from its own employees to bring in national house arrest and crush small businesses. 

But now they're back baby!

But Amnesty International UK's policing expert warned that arming volunteer officers is 'dangerous' and will inevitably lead to 'more instances of misuse, serious harm and death from Tasers'. 

Oliver Feeley-Sprague.....

Stop laughing you oiks! 

Oliver Feeley-Sprague, a member of the independent advisory group to the National Police Chiefs' Council lead on Tasers....

Well, isn't that just great? The public had the opportunity to vote for a party that was totally in tune with Amnesty International's agenda in December 2019... and they gave the other guys an eighty-seat majority but apparently none of that matters. Amnesia Intentional (motto: just forget about how many of our baby seals have turned out to be spitting cobras)  might be toxic at the ballot box but that's no reason why they can't drive public policy. 

Mandate? They don't need no stinking mandate!

Back to my usual point: if the cuckservatives really were all about electability, well, here's a £1,000 note lying on the ground that none of them want to pick it up. Kicking these entitled snooty prats to the kerb would do more for the Tories electoral prospects than any number of fine-tuned facebook ads and cutesy slogans. But no, they won't do it. 

Spoiler alert: the left doesn't rely on obscure committees operating closed doors because its agenda is popular, and the cucks don't oppose actual conservatism because it isn't. 

It's Their Country, We're Just Living In It

Ah show biz... sometimes it's stupid and toxic, other times it's just the opposite: toxic and stupid. 

Still, as long as politics are downstream of culture we need to pay attention to it all. After all, you can't have kids growing up immersed in leftist garbage and then expect them to go straight to voting conservative once they turn eighteen. 

Then there's the other thing - how liberal behave in show biz reveals how they would behave everywhere else if they had that same level of domination. 

All of which is why we have to talk about the whole Doctor Woke fiasco. 

Reminder: if the BBC just wanted to have a black lead in Doctor Who they could have bought back Jo Martin. Her Doctor had some real gravitas, some actual depth - which is more than we ever had with Jodie Whitaker's portrayal of the Doctor as some kind of Galactic children's TV presenter. 

But no: instead they went with this guy, no doubt based on his previous work in... [checks notes] Netflix's 'Sex Education'. 

In case you haven't seen that show, to name it is to know it for the desperate exercise in try-hard edginess that it is. What it isn't is anything close to the sci-fi/fantasy genre. 

True, he is - allegedly - an actor so maybe he has the necessary range but given that he's taken over an iconic character and all he can talk about is muh representation I'm not hopeful. 

Yeah, yeah, I can see you've given some deep thought to what you can bring to the role. 

In so far as he seems to think that casting a black actor in a sci-fi/fantasy series is some kind of ground-breaking moment in pop culture history he doesn't seem to know much of anything about the genre he's supposed to be working in anyway. 

Basically, he's Jodie Whitaker Mark II, with race husting in place of girrrrl powah nonsense. 

The bottom line is that this guy hasn't been cast because he can bring anything to the sci-fi/fantasy genre, he's been cast because he can't. The BBC has always been deeply embarrassed by the Doctor Who fanbase - they'd really much rather pander to the kind of groovy teachers and disco vicars who watch 'Sex Education' hence this latest attempt to turn 'Doctor Who' into 'Sex Education in Space'. 

Yeah, yeah: you can make your own jokes, but the thing is that a lot of the 'Doctor Who' audience is geeky, kind of loser-y and just a bit weird and that's the point. The show managed to score lucrative overseas sales and merchandising deals while still being a a show for the people left on the kerb by the rest of our culture. It's for all the kids for whom travelling to another planet is only as unlikely as getting an invite to a cool party. 'Doctor Who' gave them a sense of belonging and hopefulness even when nothing else could and now the BBC - our public service broadcaster remember - is taking it away from them just out of spite. 

To the point: at any one time there are approximately eighty-six shows catering to the same North London wannabe cool wine aunt demographic as 'Sex Education' but it turns out eighty-six shows at once just aren't enough. No, Gaia forbid that one show should cater to the nerds. Literally everything on TV must be made for people in Islington. This is not representation, it's the exact opposite, a load of arrogant Metropolitan elitists are outraged that there is one - one - show on TV that doesn't pander to them. 

Everything must be about them at all times.  

This is who they are. They think they should get their way always even when they, say, lose a  referendum. Doesn't matter! Leave voters are losers so their votes shouldn't count anyway. 

Ditto, it's why Sir Kneealot went big on Partygate even while out in the real world household budgets were being crunched. Paying bills is boring and provincial, bogus thespian outrage is where it's at!

The British left has become what it once opposed, an incestuous and insular elite living lives of absurd privilege and sneering at the rest of the country. 

And their shows are rubbish too.