Thursday, May 27, 2010


Haven't had a good Steyn quote for a while, but here he is reminding us that sometimes a cigar is just a cigar:
Before the body was found, The Independent's Robert Fisk offered a familiar argument to Pearl's kidnappers: Killing him would be "a major blunder... the best way of ensuring that the suffering" – of Kashmiris, Afghans, Palestinians – "goes unrecorded." Other journalists peddled a similar line: if you release Danny, he'll be able to tell your story, get your message out, "bridge the misconceptions." But the story did get out; the severed head is the message; the only misconception is that that's a misconception.
Well, quite. A lot of liberal babbling at the moment reminds me of Len Deighton's line about Chamberlain deciding to deal with Hitler as though he was a civilised man, since he had no idea how to deal with him if he was not.

The BBC: Predicting The Footy Results At 4:59

Also defying all reasonable expectations, the BBC reveals that senior civil servants thought Labour's rampant spending was insane.

Say, you know when that would have been worth knowing? Before the election.

No, Femiloons Don't Oppose Rape Actually

Femiloons are enraged... actually, that's pretty much goes without saying. This time, they're specifically enraged! by coalition moves towards sexual equality.

What? Of course that's a fair summary. Hey, if the local council paying someone who does manual labour out in all weathers more than someone who does clerical work in a climate controlled office is The Sexism! (more women work inside than men, see), it surely is discriminatory for the courts to extend privileges to a mostly female demographic while denying them to a mostly male one.

Even back on Earth, it's hard to see what their problem is... Well, actually, it's perfectly easy to see what their problem is. As befits a bunch of bigoted nutcases, they truly believe that one of the lower orders offending a female in and off itself should be actionable. Unfortunately, that's proving to be a tough sale, so instead they claim they're really concerned about rape, and since all men are rapists, well, work it out for yourself....

Or get a man to do it, then claim you totally could have done it yourself if you weren't so oppressed.

The thing is though, if they really opposed rape, they'd be concentrating at least some of their fire on a demographic that really do commit a lot of rapes, namely rapists, but that never seems to happen.

This case
is interesting for two reasons, firstly the sighting of the rare, but increasingly common, Victims of No Appearance. I guess it's further evidence for my Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy theory that knowledge of the offender automatically precludes knowledge of the victim and vice versa.

The other thing that's remarkable though is the sentence, or lack thereof:
A 'barbaric' robber who took part in the rape and torture of a young couple in their own home was jailed indefinitely today.

Gavin Gordon, 31, a drug addict who has a string of convictions for violence dating back more than ten years, was part of a gang that raped a 26-year-old woman in her home in Clapham, south London, while her boyfriend screamed as he was tortured in the next room.
I know what you're thinking: indefinite, huh? Sounds about right, throw the key away.

Except, in the Bizarro world of the courts, indefinite turns out to be kind of definite, after all:
[Gordon] must serve a minimum of nine years.
What are the odds, hey?

Just what do they think's going to happen in the next nine years to make this scumbag a worthwhile member of society? A visit from the Sociopathy Fairy? Or is it just another case of a headline-grabbing tough sentence that turns out to be pure leftist spin (meanwhile, apparently it's the right that's 'politicising the courts').

Here's a guy who's the worst of the worst. If femiloons were really opposed to rape, they'd want to make sure guys like this got meaningful sentences. Instead, a degenerate predator has got a slap on the wrist and providing he can face the terrible ordeal of a tribunal made up of the self-same type of liberal snivellers who refused to give him a proper sentence in the first place, he'll soon be back on the streets with years of active raping ahead of him. And the femiloons?


It's all too yawnerooney for them. They want the right to ruin the life of the boy next door on a whim, but their fellow liberals can all but fit a revolving door on the courts with nary a word.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

When Diversity Daleks ATTACK!

Julie & commentors have a bit of fun with fascist pillock Peter Lee, and made the obvious 'Death Camp of Tolerance' reference, but the insanity of demanding tolerance at gunpoint is just the tip of the minaret.

First up, there's what it says about our nation's schools. They're studying Islam so they need to play dress up and go to a Mosque? What will they do if they study World War I? Dig up the footy pitch and string barbed wire on the goal line?

Yes, I can see how that approach can have its upsides during Sex Ed, but don't ask what the dress code is for the compulsory trip to 'The Swinging Stallion'.

I can't help thinking something's missing here. To paraphrase what Laurence Olivier said to Dustin Hoffman after he found out Dustin had stayed awake for three nights to prepare for a scene in Marathon Man: 'why not try teaching, dear boy'?

Oops. Guess we've got the answer to that one. A parent tried to exercise her legal right to withdraw her child from religious indoctrination, and his response is write a ranty letter with the CAPS LOCK key jammed on. This is what passes for reasoned argument in schools these days?


All of which leads to another pile of hot, steaming humbug. Right now, Lee and his fellow headcases headteachers are whining and yammering about SATS. Apparently, carrying out objective tests to determine just what we're getting for all this money wastes too much teaching time... but I guess there's always time for Islamogrovelling? How about if we held the tests at a Mosque?

Then there's the other charge against SATS: they force teachers to 'teach to the tests' instead of being able to encourage da yoof to think for themselves - you know, just like the way this prat encourages pupils to think for themselves by trying to lawlessly bully them into attending indoctrination sessions with the Mad Mullah of Merseyside. Hmmmmm..... anyone think he'll be encouraging the kids to ask if it *really* goes dark at night because the Sun disappears into a muddy pool at the edge of the world? Or is it more likely that pointing out that black dogs aren't actually possessed by demons would provoke another ranty fit from the Marxist twerp?

Then again, I'd bet good money that he's never heard those particular bits of Islamic wisdom. See, here's the thing: even if the people he tried to slime really were everything he says, fascists, Nazis, bigots, they'd still be showing more, genuine, respect for Islam than liberal freaks ever do. At least these people recognise Islam as a wholly alien ideology, with its own unique set of values. Marxoid berks treat Muslims as though they were just Guardian readers with a tendency towards colourful rhetoric. It's leftists that are too small-minded to see the world as anything other than their own goofy obsessions writ large.

This is why liberal tolerance is a fraud - it's always predicated on the idea that their victims d'jour are liberals like them, but with a wacky dress sense. When the ungrateful wogs make a break off the reservation - see 'Sikhs' for further details - liberals sound like Nick Griffin's more bigoted brother. Meanwhile, I'm willing to bet that hell will freeze over before Captain Tolerance invites any actual conservatives in to talk to da kids.

Sunday, May 09, 2010

Tories Seethe, Whine: They'd Have Gotten Away With It Too, If It Weren't For U-Meddling-KIPs

Old Meme: Now that the divinely-inspired leadership of The Dave has cleansed the Tory Party of reactionary elements, nothing can stop him crushing Prime Mentalist Gordon McDoom.

New Meme: There's no way even a God-like individual like Cameron could be expected to beat a master politician like Gordon Brown while elements on the right were still sulking about trivia.

All things considered, for a group of people who supposedly champion individual responsibility, there's an awful lot of victimhood floating round the Tories right now. Actually, that's Clue Number One right there: all this talk of how they've been unfairly deprived of victory by people voting for someone else does suggest a certain sense of entitlement.

Spin to the contrary, if large parts of the conservative base treat the Tories with contempt, it's purely because they sense the feeling's mutual. Eliminating large chunks of the conservative base from the Tory Party was an explicit objective of Cameronism, for example Party Chairman Francis Maude claimed the Tories had to 'lose twenty-five to gain fifty' (so at least they got half-way there).

To the point, these missing voters didn't leave the Tory Party, the Tories left them, then threw a brick through their window. To put it another way, if the Tories now had a 100 seat majority, the same people currently raging about UKIP would be citing it as proof of Cameron's status as the World's Smartest Man.

No Tory leader in history has exercised as much personal control over the Party as Cameron. In some respects it was quite impressive to turn the world's oldest party into a personality cult but it does make it hard for his acolytes to now claim he's a hapless victim of circumstance. In reality, Cameron's strategy failed in both quantitative and qualitative terms.

Consider the gay movement. Short of having Graham Norton sodomise him with a crucifix live on stage, Cameron couldn't have done more appease them, and that brilliant strategy was how the Tories ended up with grand total of 9% of their votes - which is to say, 9% of 2.8% of the voting population. Given those numbers, it might have been simpler just to buy them all tickets for Kylie's next gig.

Then there's the Cameron's Clones on the A-List. Oops. And an extra 'oops' for Chief Crony Joanne Cash who, lest we forget, had The Dave personally run interference for her. Guess she needed those dinosaurs after all.

See, this is the whole thing with Cameronism: they never argued policy, instead the whole alibi for these people was that they'd unlocked the secret of electability. Everyone who pointed out that the Tory program was an incoherent mess was denounced as a, well, dinosaur who needed to get with program. That excuse only works if you actually get elected, not if you screw up and whine about other people cruelly voting against you for no reason at all.

That's Clue Number Two: the collective look of bemusement that's settled on the Tories while they grapple with the whole 'voting your ideals' thing ('OK, they believe in traditional British values but what's their real agenda')?

That's the real knock on Cameronism. Some in the Tory grass roots may have believed that Cameronism merely meant adopting a few fashionably post-ideological poses, but after five years of Cameron, the Tory Party is so hollowed out that that when they encounter people that really do believe what they say, they're completely thrown.

So it would be for a Tory government. The Tories have relentlessly triangulated and trimmed their positions down to vanishing point. Cameronism sees the Tory Party's role as merely quibbling over the specifics even as it implicitly accepts the left's assumptions about all the big issues. It means accepting as inevitable, and even desirable, an ever-growing state, taking in more and more tax and producing ever more regulations, bureaucrats and bottom inspectors. And UKIP voters are supposed to feel guilty for opposing that?

Friday, May 07, 2010

Thursday, May 06, 2010

A Unique Moment In Our National Life

It's easy to be cynical right now, but let's not forget what an opportunity we have here. We have the chance to go into work tomorrow late and a physical wreck and still claim the moral high ground.

Yes, indeed. Some of us are aiming to get so caught up in the drama of it all, we feel it's our civic duty to stay up and watch the results come in from Fulchester South at 6 AM. If that unfortunately means we spend the whole of Friday with what appears to be a massive hangover, then that is just the price of democracy, and holding elections on the same day as Wetherspoons Curry Night. It's our democratic right, so stand tall, stand proud and don't forget the breath mints.

Besides, with Lord Snooty on course for a 55 seat majority, we'll all need a drink, so you're just being pro-active.


Toby Young, of all people, sums up exactly what's so plain yucky about Cameronism:
Hogwarts is, in fact, a microcosm of exactly what old-fashioned Tories would like Britain to be. It’s a rigidly hierarchical society, presided over by a benign, but stern patrician figure – a sort of wizardly version of Harold Macmillan – in which everybody knows their place. The educated middle class (Potter, Weasley, Grainger) forge an alliance with the ruling class (Dumbledore et al) to preserve order, while the aspirational lower middle class, as represented by the Dursleys, are comic grotesques. The working class (Muggles), by contrast, are a poor, ignorant multitude who must, by dint of their helplessness, entrust their best interests to the elite. Anyone who challenges this status quo is, quite literally, demonised and cast into the outer darkness.
Actually, there's even more to it than that. The whole thing with Harry Potter is that he was destined from birth to be The Specialest Wizard Evah! He never earned his status, it was simply his birthright. Now, who does that sound like?

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

The A-Z Of Cameron

All things considered, I don't think of Cameron as either the heir to Blair or a British Obama. Amusing though it is to ridicule this horrible twosome for their messianic pretensions, the flip side of that is that at least both had halfway coherent visions of what they wanted to achieve.

On the other hand, in so far as the defining feature of Cameronism is the absurd mismatch  of ludicrously overblown efforts in pursuit of ridiculously trivial ends, he resembles nothing so much as our very own Slick Willy.

All of which is by way of saying that after being reminded of Mark Steyn's brilliant A-Z of the Clinton Years, I thought I'd try my very own version for Cam Jong Il himself.

A is for A-List: Being the list of approved candidates Cameron tried to foist on local parties almost as soon as he took office. Yes, indeed: never forget that almost the first thing principled advocate of localism Dave did was start working on ways to stuff the backbenches with Cameron's Cronies.

B is for Bike: As in the thing Eco Dave rides to the office... closely followed by a chauffer-driven Lexus. Apparently, it's carrying his papers, which explains why he needs a Lexus rather than, say, a Ford Fiesta. Doubtless, there will be some government grants going soon for people to investigate ways to transmit paperwork electronically. Or rucksacks.

C is for Catchment Area: All these bonkers ideas about parents setting up their own schools can't hide the fact that under Cameron catchment areas are here to stay. Unless you're a certain public figure, who sent his daughter to a exclusive, all white, primary school, avoiding 15 closer ones. Hmmm...say, I thought this guy liked...

D is for Diversity: Yes, indeed. Under Dave the Conservative Party is the United Colours of Yuppie Scum. A party that looks like Britain, except for all those bits outside the M25. Actually, what it's most like is a BBC show: it's full of bright, young things covering the whole spectrum of ethnicities and sexual orientations and you never see any actual conservatives. And, of course, what could be more diverse than...

E is for Eton: Apparently, in the Britain Cameron thinks the Tory Party should look like, about 25% of the population have gone to Eton. Proof positive that he does indeed live in a world of his own.

F is for Fat Licences: Remember these?

G is for Gayers: And if you disagree, you, Sir, have no place on the modern Internet!

H is for Huskies: In retrospect, The Dave flying to the Arctic to warn of the dangers of letting proles holiday abroad was probably the first clue...

I is for Islam: It's the Religion of Peace, except for the tiny minority of extremists. On the other hand, people who say Indian Jihadists are 'freedom fighters' and welcome the election of Hamas are perfectly reasonable and, indeed, deserving of a peerage and a position as Shadow Minister for Community Cohesion.

J Is for Jogging: Yes, indeed: he can't even exercise honestly.

K is for Kilo: ...Actually, not really sure where this fits in... Except here's a guy who keeps jibber-jabbering about the dangers of hayte speech, but doesn't see any downside at all in a  rich and successful public figure indulging in nodding and winking non-denials about his relationship with hard drugs.

L is for Land Rover: As in the British Army's main mode of transport in Afghanistan long after it became obvious they were utterly worthless against IEDs. Meanwhile, the Leader of Her Majesty's Opposition was posing as Don't Call Me At All Dave. British soldiers were getting killed needlessly and a soi dissant conservative leader was refusing to raise that issue in Parliament lest talking about nasty macho stuff like defence ruin his touchy feely image.

M is for Marriage: Which The Dave supports, but that's not to say that he doesn't support other lifestyles too. But marriage is special, and so are other relationships too.

See, what's confusing about that?

N is for Nazi Germany: What England was exactly like in 2006, apparently. It was all the flags flying for the World Cup, see? That pearl of wisdom comes from Cameron Crony Brian Coleman. Who says these guys have issues with patriotism?

O is for Oxbridge: Just like Eton, these guys also get a waiver on the whole 'Party that looks like Britain' thing.

P is for Prejean, Carrie: The woman shadow cabinet member Alan Duncan jovially suggested should be murdered for opposing gay marriage. Which is a perfectly normal thing for a senior politician to suggest. Keep watching out for those right-wing extremists!

Q is for Queen: Friend of Dave Liz Truss wanted to throw her out of a job in favour of a republic, until approximately six seconds before she was parachuted into a safe seat. But don't go questioning her conservative credentials, you bigot!

R is for Rapist: Just so you know, while The Dave was excommunicating large swathes of the conservative base as just too crazy, he had no objection to palling around with a racist nutcase with convictions for gang rape.

S is for Selection: Bad if its based on educational achievement, good if it's based on... singing?

T is for Taxes: Is there a better example of Cameron's train wreck understanding of conservatism than his policy that he'll reduce the burden on British businesses just as soon as the economy has recovered?

U is for UKIP: Fruitcakes, loonies and closet racists, apparently, but they should still vote for The Dave because otherwise someone who doesn't like them might get in.

V is for Virology: The study of viruses, which so far has failed to uncover any evidence in support of Cameron Crony Francis Maude's bizarre suggestion that Mrs Thatcher was responsible for the spread of AIDS (which is in no way a hateful thing to say...).

W is for Wisteria: £30 million in the bank and he's hitting up the taxpayer to maintain his house? Classy!

X is for Xenophobia: The other charge always thrown at UKIP by The Dave and pals, despite the fact that UKIP aren't led by a man who was a member of the Bullingdon Club, a society that's overtly  and indeed proudly, Judenfrei.

Y is for Yeo: As in Tim Yeo, the Shadow Cabinet minister who called for more taxes to discourage people  from flying, even while moonlighting as a globe-trotting golf course reviewer for a national newspaper.

Z is for Zac: Zac Goldsmith. Friend of Dave and another worthless multi-millionaire legatee and eco-pest, who called for more taxes to prevent people flying, even while commuting in from tax exile in Switzerland.