Thursday, January 05, 2006

Arbeit Macht Frei

Just to summerise recent events: Cameron gave a speech talking about the evils of chocolate oranges and that still wasn't the nuttiest thing he's said all week. In case you missed Cameron declaring the 'War on Chocolate Oranges', he was worried that innocent bloaters are being held down and forced to eat chocolate by the evil minions of big business.

Speaking personally, nothing says ‘serious politics’ to me more than a stoner lecturing the public on healthy lifestyles. Given Cameron’s public pronouncements, I give it three years into the Cameron premiership before you’ll turn on the TV to hear six people have been charged with trying to smuggle chocolate into the country hidden in a crate of cocaine.

On the other hand, Cameron is particularly well equipped to talk about companies encouraging excess: via Laban, we find this. Hey, I’m all in favour of binge drinking, but then I don’t want civil servants hiding behind the magazine racks, ready to ambush innocent fatties.

Then again, coherency has never been Cameron’s thing. That’s why I can’t get excited about the fact he gives his speeches without notes. Hey, with one of his speeches, who couldn’t ? How hard can it be to spend ten minutes stringing random soundbites together….. communities… new…. modern… reach out…. schools….. opportunity… zzzzzzzzzzz ?

At least I always assumed Cameron was simply incoherent, but recent events have suggested that he actually has no idea what it is he’s saying in the first place. Try this:
[Cameron] said trusting people and sharing responsibility would be at the heart of his Conservative Party, which he claimed was heading "into the mainstream of British politics".
And what was he pushing in that speech ?
School-leavers could be forced to do community work under a Conservative government, David Cameron has said.

He said full details had yet to be worked out but options included a compulsory scheme lasting four months, with lottery cash as a funding option.
Yes, he’s trusting people , he’s trusting them to serve as a member of People’s Labour Battalion 2371. I mean, I know those of us on the Right keep saying that Liberalism always ends in the Gulag, but the corrupting effect of power isn’t supposed to take effect until people are actually in power. What’s this guy going to be like when he doesn’t have to face an election ?

Could things get any worse ? Try this:
In a speech last July, Mr Cameron spoke of his desire to create a "new National Movement" to replicate the sense of shared achievement experienced by people of his father's generation who did national service.

"We should view this new enterprise as something for every young person in our country. An essential part of growing up to be a British citizen, not just an add-on extra for a select few", said Mr Cameron in his speech.
Forget stoner health tips, here we have a guy who’s never held down an real job in his life jabbering about the benefits of forced labour. I notice he isn’t getting measured up for a spade (mind you, he wouldn’t know what to call it).

Just for the record: an essential part of growing up to be a British citizen is learning to appreciate the great gift of living in a country where the government can’t arbitrarily decide to press you into servitude. Let other less fortunate nations suffer under the curse of ‘National Movements’. Britain’s glory is precisely that we were the first nation not to buy all this rubbish. In nations where the citizen is little more than a drone to be disposed of at the whim of the elite (oops, I mean ‘for the good of society’), there is no end of need for ‘shared achievements’ and the like. A healthy society should not need such Frankensteinian methods to ensure the loyalty of its citizens. Forced labour in time of peace is not a cure for our social problems, but the fact it can be seriously suggested is a good clue as to how things got so screwed up in the first place.

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