Empty Suit Makes Empty Gesture

Inspired by The Dave's trip into the belly of the beast to ask all forty-something nations involved in the European Court of Human Rights racket to agree with his plan to make it less awful, I'm going on a trip to Scunthorpe to demand someone gives me a solid gold Ferrari full of diamonds.

Some might say my plan is a barely coherent fanatsy, but if it doesn't work I'll quit and go home, which at least makes more sense than The Dave's threat that if he doesn't get his way, he will ask them again.

About That Political Genius Thing...

IDS launches the long-overdue drive for a benefit cap and the Maximum Leader is nowhere to be seen. What are the odds, huh?

Call me cynical, but I can't help thinking that this policy was meant as a piece of red meat to be thrown to the idiots (i.e. actual conservatives) before being reluctantly abandoned after 48 hours but, shockingly, it turns out that there really is a huge chunk of the public who object to paying taxes to give people more in welfare than they earn themselves.

They'll be saying the Mail outsells the Guardian next.

See, that's the penalty of basing your policy platform on appealing to a tiny slither of North London. You really do start to think that an income equivalent to £34K gross is the equivalent of Dickensian poverty.

Meanwhile, that creaking sound is one of the central pillars of the left's platform collapsing into dust. They've spent years telling everyone that the Tories are heartless. Now they've got to explain that by 'heartless' they mean 'opposed to taxing people with jobs so they can give some other people more for watching TV than most of the country earns working full time'. Virtually single-handedly IDS has exposed the bogus nature of the poverty industry.

Mind you, Daveism isn't looking much better. The whole essence of Cameroonacy was the idea of going along to get along. Nasty old ideology was thrown overboard, in favour of squelchy, right of left of right of centre consensus. Now IDS have gone ahead with some red meat conservatism and the left has had to hide behind a bunch of unelected men in frocks (who incidentally pay some of their employees far less than £34K).

On the plus side, I guess the left will have to put a hold on its ranting about faith schools for a month or so.

As ever though, when the subject of the Greatest Political Genius In History is raised, you have to ask: what definition of 'genius' are we using here?

Fort Apache: Salford

Now is this not the perfect metaphor for modern liberalism ? Britain's state broadcaster shifts some facilities from one part of Britain to another part of Britain, but let's not go crazy and expect them to start rubbing shoulders with the locals.

Hey, some of these people have never even heard of hummus.

Personally, I could almost live with the BBC making like Stanley Baker in Zulu, if only we didn't have to listen to their endless jibber jabber about diversity. Their staff roster looks like the United Colours of Liberalism, but they'd rather drink the local water than risk hiring someone who may once have gone to see a non-Premiership football match.

The Rich Aren't Enriched

Who'd have thunk it? The Celebutrash have abandoned our nation's vibrant capital for the boringly monochorme countryside. What can it all mean?

If Ed Miliband Was Smart....

... he wouldn't be a liberal, would he?

Nevertheless, ignoring that fundamental rule of the universe, if Miliband was smart, then he'd realise he has a tailor-made opportunity to 'detoxify his brand' - as Satan's Representative in No 10 would no doubt put it - simply by throwing scum like this under the bus.

Nothing sums up the demented nature of the modern left better than a soi-dissant socialist party that supports taxing janitors in Leeds to give money to millionaire luvvies in London, so they can make films about how folk in Yorkshire are ignorant bigots.

Mixed Messages?

...Or just proof the rules are different for the High Priests of the Media.

The Mail supports restrictions on free speech when it comes to you-know-what, but issues pious proclamations about the vital importance of the press being free to slime a dead guy.

Elves!

Because it's still funny.

Liberals: Still Scum

I'm thinking this case is the perfect microcosm of the difference between left and right.

Yes, indeed, HSBC were their usual sleazy selves, and it's disgraceful that their senior management have managed to avoid disbarment for conduct that would have got a small town IFA strung up, but at least they've faced some consequences.

Meanwhile, the supposed charidees wot exist to help the helpless? Ah yes: they traded on their (undeservedly) good reputations to lead the marks into the lion's den, and they've got away with the cash, their reputations intact and in all probability a press release ready to go asking for the government to give them a grant to help protect their clients from predatory capitalist pig dogs.

Victim of No Appearance

Further proof for my theory that, just like the Ultimate Question & Answer in the Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy, you can either know the felon's background or the victim's, but never the two at once.

Yep, two Afghanis - probably Mormons - stalk the streets and rape a 'woman'.

Really? Any particular type of woman? Anything in particular driving this choice of victim? Considering she was pulled off the street, there can only be a limited number of things that could have driven them to target this particular victim. It's not like they were driven by an irrational hatred of left-handed dental technicians.

Hey, in so far as this was a premeditated rape of an Infidel woman by Islamosavages, exactly as demanded by the Koran, this is a textbook case of a hate crime. This is what 'hate crime' means: the use of violence to intimidate members of the target demographic.

Needless to say, m'learned friends huffed and they puffed, but then they carefully steered round the elephant in the room on their way to Jokesentanceville:

Jailat Khan, of Beeston, Leeds, was ordered to be detained for five years and Shahzada Khan, of Leeds, was ordered to be detained for four years after both admitted kidnap and rape.

Sentencing the pair on Tuesday, Judge Christopher Batty said they had targeted a vulnerable woman alone in the city centre and the effect on her was 'immeasurable'.

Phew! Just think if it hadn't affected her so badly, he might have let them off with a light sentence. As it is, it now appears you can take part in a brutal rape and get exactly the same sentence Jeffrey Archer got for perjury.

Meanwhile, the femiloons have all gone quiet. Well, duh! They can sneer all they want at the Fifties, but compared to their craven toeing of the leftist line, the Stepford Wives look like Madonna.

Quote of the Day

Hey, some of us have been saying this for years:

Dave Cameron always knew he was born to rule. What he never stopped to analyse, unfortunately, is the more important question of why – ie to what useful purpose – he might have been born to rule.

Actually, I think the truth is even worse. It's increasingly obvious that The Dave doesn't even think the 'why' comes in to it. He simply rules by divine right. Hence the tantrums and the thuggery when any of the lower orders question God's representative on Earth. Hence the contempt for public opinion except in the most cynical posing for contrived photo-ops way. Hence the refusal to engage with even the most basic demands of the job - like turning up (five holidays already this year).

I give it two years before he starts selling indulgences.

'Loser' Is The Word

I'm in two minds about the MSM's born-again Davosceptics. It's great that they're finally managing to remove the kool aid IV from their rectum, but some of us ignorant chav scum got there years ago.

Equally, it's all second order stuff. Back in the day Cast Iron Dave's arrogance, paper thin skin and snobbery were all useful clues to how he would ultimately govern, but now he is PM, we don't need clues any more, we know exactly how he governs: badly.

Like I keep saying, The Dave's success was based on two myths: firstly, that he was an political genius and secondly, that he was a brilliant manager. Blowing a General Election in the middle of a recession scuppered the first one, and now his total incompetence is managing to kill off the second.

The Dave's whole appeal as a touchy-feely moderate was based on the idea that he could run a Labour government better than the Labour Party, and anyone who suggested that liberalism just doesn't work was clearly some kind of right-wing extremist who had no place in the modern conservative party.

Apparently, no one pointed out to The Dave that running as a technocrat sneering at the stoopid ideologues only works if you're more competent than a drunk five year with ADHD who hasn't slept for three days. As it is, Call Me Dave's whole reign has been like a giant experiment to disprove the old line about even blind pigs finding the odd truffle. At this point, talking about his control freakery, dubious land deals and five holidays a year counts as letting him off the hook. It's utter failure that's the outstanding feature of his time in office.

I think we can take a lesson from Ace of Spades blog, and it's running gag of referring to the Obamamessiah as SCoaMF - as in Stuttering Clusterfuck of a Miserable Failure. The Dave don't stutter, but he's more than made up for it with the rest of it, so why pretend he's anything other than a loser?

What James Murdoch Should Tell The Select Committee

I knew exactly as much about phone hacking as Theresa May knew about abandoning border controls, or John Prescott knew about blowing half a billion on a failed reorganisation of the Fire Service.

Theresa May, Or Possibly May Not

Who can tell, huh? It's always the little things that trip you up, like the defence of the realm.

Now Theresa is busy deploying the Reverse Nuremberg defence: whatever happened, they weren't following orders, plus the dog ate her briefing documents and she didn't know nuffink, guv.

It does raise an interesting philosophical question: which possibility is worse? Theresa May is too thick to work out that border security is important, or she just decided that there were higher priorities than stopping the Mad Bomber coming in?

Whatever the specifics though, this case has exposed the fault line in Cameronism. The Dave's whole selling point was that he wasn't some nasty old right-wing extremist, he was a cool, middle of the road unifier - once he'd finished purging all the conservatives out of his party anyway. In reality, Cameron's supposed reasonableness boiled down to the Tories taking all the face card jobs in Whitehall (oops - guess the coalition thing scuppered that) but leaving Labour appointees in place to get on with the job.

Whatever May did or did not do, in so far as it was a central part of Cameron's strategy not to clear out activist civil servants, he bears ultimate responsibility for the fact that liberals are free to continue to push liberal policies, even after Cameron's Cronies all got their keys to the Executive Washroom.

This Is Why We Can't Have A Referendum On The EU

The Government doesn't want the distraction when it's dealing with the really important stuff....

Vince Avoiding Tax

Is it just me or has anyone else noticed that the only time politicians aren't telling the rest of us how to run our lives is when they're busy denying all responsibility for anything in their own lives?

Ann Got There First

This isn't much of a mystery. To paraphrase Ann Coulter, the only difference between people like Cameron and actual liberals is that The Dave wants the right to beat his servants.

As much as current employment laws offers opportunities for shakedowns'n'slacking, they're nothing compared to the discrimination industry, but don't hold your breath for Dave to take on Victims R Us.

Ditto, with sword, oak leaves and gold cluster, the public sector unions.

It's not about improving competitiveness, it's about screwing down the working man some more. As usual with the Nu Tory Revolution, the ordinary Joe will get the shaft, while the race hustlers, femiloons and other associated bums will keep coining it in.

Wizard of Oz Calls for Three-Line Whip On Motion To Look Behind Curtain

Include me out of all that deep thinking about why Cameron called a three-line whip over the referendum vote. I can't help thinking there's less to it than meets the eye.

Cast Iron Dave rose with the help of two myths, one that he was a brilliant political operator, and two that he was the Smartest Guy in the Room. In reality, he blew an election against a gibbering loon in the depths of recession, while his term in office has been such a chaotic train wreck of U-turns, bungling and sleazy compromises that he makes John Major look like Churchill.

All that Cameron has left is an essentially tautological argument: he's the leader becuase he's the leader. He has no choice but to devote all his time to bullying everyone outside the bunker - with his record, it's all he has left.

Liberalism: Multiple Fraud Disorder

Don't be shocked, but one of the most famous cases in psychology turns out to be a really huge fraud.

It's all very disappointing though. Alex Haley had just claimed to have tracked down one of the personalities to her home village.

Meanwhile, some of us are still wondering about people who claim to be Certified Super Genii, but keep falling for obvious frauds. Still, claiming a young girl has sixteen people living in her head is still less goofy than claiming dangerous felons can be rehabilitated by six months of group therapy twice a week, and at least 'Sybil' didn't take an axe to anyone's head.

Special Ed: Conservative Hero

Wait..... did I sleep through Conference Season?

No, it just seemed that way. It says something about the pointless of the modern party conference that the closest we got to an actual conservative point during the whole nightmare came from Ed Milliband.

Personally, I liked Special Ed's idea to divide businesses into 'good' and 'bad' categories with different laws and tax rates for each. It's like a liberal version of the Flat Tax, a way to sweep away bureaucratic complexity in favour of a more streamlined system. True, you could say it's a little arbitrary and open to corruption, but not noticeably more so than what we have now, and at least we won't have the pretence that it's anything other than the raw exercise of government power.

All that's without considering the other upside. In so far as the leader of Britain's main party of the left has called for the state to abandon the whole 'equal under law' thing in favour of the legal equivalent of a blank cheque, with nary a dissenting voice on the left, Special Ed has exposed the true nature of the left's civil liberties frauds. What could be more injurious to liberty than the state claiming an open-ended right to arbitrarily victimise any business it pleases? Don't ask Shami and pals though - they're too busy investigating allegations that a terrorist was given lukewarm milk on his coco-pops.

Trembling in the Shadow of Latte (And Other Stupid Ideas)

In so far as Certified Liberal Deep Thinker Vince Cables' latest line of attack is to accusse the right of wanting to send kids up chimineys, it does ram home an important point: there are no good arguments left for liberalism.

People on the right are arguing that a recession is no time to be treating our last surviving private businesses as pinata donkeys full of employee freebies, meanwhile the left is relying on girly hysteria....

Actually, that same dynamic applies to just about any issue. That's the dark secret of liberalism: they don't want to keep university campuses free of conservatives because they think we're morons, they want it because they know we're not. Ditto, in any nation without a bloated state broadcaster with its hand on the scales, Vince Cable would be a national joke.

We should be mocking these people like the loons they are, but instead, the conservative establishment not only treats them like political heavyweights, it allows them to set the terms of the debate, as though there were any kind of meaningful middle-ground to be reached with people who compare opposing compulsory employer-paid aromatherapy with support for child labour.

Enough already, there's no reason to pander to the deranged. On the contrary, the more they have to come out and argue for liberlalism, the more obvious it becomes that 'liberal intellectual' is more a diagnosis than a description. Hence the liberal obsession with hate speech: they need to shut down the debate because every time they have to compete in the marketplace of ideas, they go bankrupt.