They're Not 'Handcuffs', They're 'Freedom Bracelets'

Seriously, us sane people are already hanging on like Charlton Heston in The Omega Man without having our own side using nonsense phrases like 'vaccine passports'.

No, they're not 'vaccine passports', they're 'life licences'. Literally everything you want to do will be subject to government approval. 

Forget talking about Henry VIII, Oliver Cromwell or whoever your preferred villain from British history is, none of these guys insisted you needed their OK to drop into the local tavern or buy some turnips. 

Once this system is in place it's all over. And no, the government is not spending tens of billions on a system that they will scrap after a year. Surely everyone now realises that the constant stream of new strains - Brazillian! South African! Atlantian! - are just prepping the ground for them to wheel out new threats every time anyone suggests removing restrictions?

Of course, they say it's all about muh saving lives except spending tens of billions on almost any other area of healthcare would save actual lives, not merely theoretical lives saved from the Fijian, Chilean or Nigerian strains. Overhauling our shambolic cancer and maternity sectors alone would save 10x the lives these life licences would save, and they'd be real lives, not theoretical deaths from the some hypothetical future strains. 

It needs to be emphasised how intrusive this system will be. The government having a complete record of where everyone has been is the least dangerous part of it. 

What's our biggest health problem aside from the Worst Virus Evah?

Yep, obesity, so what's to stop life licences being programmed to only allow people to visit restaurants or pubs twice a week? 

Nothing. At all. 

Equally, even if you're a puritan and you think only an alcoholic would need to go the pub more than twice a week, it can work the other way. Fail to go to the gym at least twice in the last seven days? The system can take your £50 fixed penalty out of your account automatically at the start of Day 8. 

This isn't a conspiracy theory, this is a capability baked into the system. Once it's up and running all this naturally follows. All it takes is for people to accept that the public is accountable to the government not the other way round. 

In fact, it can even be meshed with supermarket check out systems. No more loading up on pizza. It'll be max two with every visit, and then only if you don't use your calorie allowance on cakes or ice cream. 

And then there's the bizarre (non) coincidence that this is all happening as the eco-mentalists are demanding people give up eating meat. Could these same systems be used to enforce that? Well, yep, again once the system is in place all it will need is a small tweak to add this capability. 

This is not a small thing, this is a huge thing. We're being asked to accept a complete inversion of how our system of government works. Once you accept that your rights are now privileges to be granted or withdrawn at the whim of the government then to all intents and purposes freedom is over. 

Miami Massacre Postponed - Covid Cult Hardest Hit

The Church of Covid struck lucky when Sweden became the early poster boy for heresy. It's just exotic enough that the cult was able to bamboozle people into accepting that it was basically an icy wasteland where people lived miles apart from each other - possibly in igloos - hence no need for Lockdown4Eva. 

I don't think they'll get away with that once people hear about Florida. If the Covid Cult was right, then Florida's heresy should have led to mass slaughter. 

Spoiler Alert: that didn't happen. 

Enough British people have been to Florida that they won't accept that it's just that the virus can't spread in a deserted wasteland like the South Beach area of Miami. Here was the ultimate test of the prophesies of the Church of Covid and it turns out that the wages of sin are.... wages, actually. Folks are able to keep their jobs, keep their businesses open and all with no higher a death toll than in the demented theocracies of California or New York. 

Hence why the soi dissant science lovers are starting to sound like Kansas creationists explaining where all the fossils came from. 

Britain: Where The Scientific Theories Never Work Out, But The Conspiracy Theories Always Do

Good news everyone! Someone's finally been forced out at Imperial College.

No, not for anything to do with the rubbish forecasts, don't be ridiculous! Phony predictions of the Apocalypse are one thing, but being rude to the pampered princes? Wholly unacceptable!

Isn't that just the perfect microcosm of where public life in Britain has gone wrong? 

Hitting the iceberg is fine, but you get thrown overboard for hashing anyone's mellow in the Wardroom. 

Lest we forget, this was the week we found out that the predictions were true -  visitors to Bournemouth last year were just like the US troops at the start of Saving Private Ryan....in the sense that both sets of people ended up on beaches. As far as similar death tolls go? Not so much. 

This gets to the heart of it: The Science predicted a massacre, mass slaughter failed to arrive, hence scientists have had no alternative but to.... keep using the same models that failed utterly. 

Like I keep saying, if your theories don't change no matter what the results say, in what sense are you doing science?   

(A vote of thanks too for the Lockdown4Eva fanatics. These results prove - again - that good airflow can massively reduce the risk from Covid but the same people who wax lyrical about muh saving lives refuse point blank to support any proposal whatsoever that doesn't start with 'L' and rhyme with Clocktown).

Meanwhile, one more 'conspiracy theory' turns out to be bang on:

Sir Patrick said the Government will keep a set of Covid measures after the country comes out of lockdown and these could include wearing masks in public.

Government scientists have also suggested people may have to follow the 'baseline' measures indefinitely, even after the vaccination roll-out is complete. In a document discussing life after Covid, SAGE said keeping some social distancing measures were 'almost certain to save many lives and minimise the threat to hospital capacity'.

Yep, The Beast has tasted human flesh and now it is insatiable. 

Who could have predicted that allowing the Government to use an emergency to take our rights away would result in a country with no end of emergencies and a shortage of rights? 

Maybe The Problem Is We Just Haven't Thrown *Enough* Virgins Down The Well....

In today's' 'Not A Cult' news, it turns out the Church of Covid has a whole new tactic to appease Wu-tan:

Dr Fauci — the US Government's top infectious diseases expert — said that it was 'common sense' that double-masking would be more effective. 

He added it was 'likely' to offer better protection against the mutant strain, which studies show partially evades immunity from vaccines and past infections

Hey, I can see how a mutation might affect the ability to evade the immune system, but I'm not sure how it makes it more likely to slip through a face nappy. Does the mutation makes it smaller? More slippery? Lets it do yoga?  

More to the point though, until six seconds ago, anyone who suggested a Boris Burka may not be totally awesome at filtering out viruses was a crazed knuckle-dragger who hated The Science. 

Suddenly, all bets are off. It turns out that one face nappy won't do it, but two? That'll do just what they spent months saying one alone would do. 

They were lying before but now? Now their plan will totally work!

Hence this guy:

And Dr Benjamin Killingley, a scientist advising the UK Government in the pandemic, also said wearing two masks was 'common sense'.

But Dr Killingley, a member of the SAGE advisory group, also admitted the claim isn't 'grounded in lots of study'.

Actually, 'common sense' said wearing a face nappy wouldn't work, and it was right. Meanwhile, Dr Ben and his pals in the Certified Scientificator Community  who told us it would totally work now want to - literally - double down.

Anyway, I thought we were supposed to be the knuckle-dragging bigots pulling stuff out of our backside! If one of our guys had started explaining that he didn't need to cite studies and stuff, 'cause it was just common sense, init, the MSM would cover it like the Martians landing. 

Where does this guy work anyway? The University of the Dog & Duck? 

This is not a small thing. A scientist who admits his theories aren't grounded in actual studies is like a judge claiming you don't need any of that 'trial' stuff just to say some guy is totes guilty. 

Then again, who needs to do actual research when everyone knows what the answer will be anyway?

The answer is moar masks. It was always going to be moar masks. 

To state the (should be) obvious: if there is no possible result that can persuade you to ditch your theories, you're not actually doing science, you're doing religion just without all that God stuff.

The Church Of Covid Sets Up An Inquisition

Honestly, if there anything more tragic than wimpy snoots trying to sound all butch? 

'Information Warriors'

Seriously?

It doesn't get better:

Sometimes, Stuart Ritchie feels like he’s being pursued by an army of smiley faces. The lecturer at the Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology and Neuroscience at King’s College London, is not delusional: instead, and somewhat to his surprise, he is on the frontline of a coronavirus information war.

That's it, that's liberal heroism: a wacademic with a lectureship in buzzword studies spending his time cyberstalking critics of the government.

Totes normal, you guys!

Sign of a healthy democracy!

Has there been a better example of the fraudypants nature of the modern left than the Guardian trying to convince us that a publicly-funded purveyor of approved truthiness is some kind of rebel? 

Nothing says 'speaking truth to power' like shouting down anyone who disagrees with the Prime Minister!

But, as Bachman Turner Overdrive told us, bbbbbbbaby, you ain't seen nothing yet!

We don't just have phony rebels, we have the phony right too!

I think you can see that the government is indirectly influenced by [lockdown sceptics],” said Sam Bowman, director of competition policy at the International Center for Law and Economics and another of those behind the site...

With most of the group on the right – two thirds, Bowman estimates - there is a sense of reputation management, too. “We were both, independently, really aggravated,” said Bowman. “Maybe it’s the narcissism of small differences – seeing people who are also theoretically on the right making such dangerous claims, it’s exasperating.”

Yep, 'reputation management', that's it. That's why the grifters in 'right wing' think tanks have all embraced Lockdown4Eva. Nothing to do with protecting the interest of their corporate donors by driving smaller competitors out of business. 

It's just a coincidence. 

Of course, if you want the best of both worlds, namely bleeding the taxpayer dry and grovelling to big corporations, nothing beats the average Tory MP: Hence we have this load of old pony from - guess who - Neil O'Brien aka the member for Amazon Prime:

“This idea it’s none of an MP’s business – trying to get to the facts of a deadly pandemic is absolutely an MP’s business,” O’Brien said. “You’ve got to look at people’s testable propositions and see how they’ve panned out. That’s how science works.”

Well, OK, then: how have Neil Ferguson's predictions held up? Or the claims that the 'high cycle' PCR test was totes reliable?  Or claims that Vitamin D had no protective benefit? Or......

Nope, he doesn't like those kind of facts. He's here to hold the public to account on behalf of the government, not the other way round. Hence why he never, ever, brings any of this rage to bear on the people responsible for the biggest single source of infection in Britain. 

Yep, he's a sleazy fraud, but what of the Guardian and the wider left? They're been pushing NHS atrocity stories for years (well, since 2010 anyway) and now they've finally got the Tories standing over a line of corpses, smoking gun in hand, they've suddenly decided that the real issue is the uppity peasantry. Sure, they may differ with weasels like Bowman and O'Brien on issues like Corporation Tax but when it all comes down to it, they really are all in this together. 

It's the ultimate irony of the Church of Covid: they've put on their Boris Burkas and taken off their masks.

Failure Is Not An Option - It's An Opportunity.

Say, did someone say conspiracy theories keep coming true?

At this point, I'm pretty sure that if Godzilla attacked Brighton then the Covid Cultists would cite it as a reason for even tighter mask mandates. 

No, there's no reason why a giant monster should be deterred by people wearing face nappies, but at least we don't have ever-increasing numbers of monster attacks running in parallel to ever-tightening mask mandates so, you know.... wearing Anti-Monster Cloths is still more scientific than anything these Covid Cult has come up with. 

Meanwhile, back in the (increasingly less) real world, it turns out the utter failure of Boris Burkhas to achieve much of anything means we need moar burkas!

Wearing a face mask while shopping for Christmas presents may slow the spread of coronavirus scientists say. 
Current rules only require the coverings to be worn inside shops, with many quickly ripping them off as soon as they step back outside. 
But leading experts have now urged Brits to keep their masks on in crowded outdoor spaces, such as packed high streets.

'Experts' is doing a lot of work here. 

Seriously:

Professor Melinda Mills, a sociologist also at Oxford University, added that Briton was an outlier in insisting masks should only be worn inside - and not outside in public.
'When we looked at the data in June, there were 71 countries who required everyone in public to be masked,' she said.

It's the science of sociology, you guys. If only there was a branch of mathematics which could allow us to look at how infection rates vary between countries with different rules!

I'm sure she might have mentioned the possibility of checking this out but she had to rush off as she's got some time booked on the new 8 Trillion Watt laser in the Sociology Labs. 

Isn't that just special though? These people have spent months telling us tO lISTEN tO tHE eXPERTS. Meanwhile, when it comes to tightening the noose everyone's an expert. Hence the appeal of the Church of Covid - simply adopt their absurd mantras (as propagated by the Government, huge corporations and 90% of the media) and you too can be hailed as a fearless warrior for the public good. 

"Alexa: What Is Today's Example of An Alleged Conspiracy Theory Becoming Current Policy"

OK, technically it was last week, but still: here we go again:

Britain will remain in some form of lockdown until at least March despite the roll out of coronavirus vaccines, Professor Chris Whitty has warned. 

The chief medical officer said not enough Brits will have been inoculated against Covid-19 over the next three months to keep the most vulnerable out of hospitals.

He urged people not to let their guard down now a jab had been approved, saying it would be 'really premature' and 'absolutely the wrong thing to do'.

Who could possibly have seen that coming?

Not the MSM anyway - and not just because they were all partying with Kay Burley. 

But at least the lockdown should help, right?

People in Wales have been 'strongly advised' to not spend Christmas with family members they don't live with after infections surged by 65 per cent in three weeks.

Say, wasn't that the home of the super strict lockdown? 

Why, yes, yes it was:

.Wales is already under a stricter lockdown than England, with pubs and restaurants required to close from 6pm and a nationwide alcohol ban across all hospitality venues. 

Oops.....

It was a lockdown but not the right type of lockdown, apparently. 

You know, you'd have thought they'd have pointed that out at the time, not waited until the whole of Wales went through it then claimed they totes knew it would fail, you guys.

That's the thing. There should, ideally, be several differences between a senior scientist and Madame Zelda what does the astrology column in the local rag, but the big one, the key one, is that scientists are supposed to make actual, *testable* predictions. What they predict will either come true or it won't. 

Meanwhile, the common theme in our nation's descent into madness has been scientists shouting that The End Is Nigh, then after the fact explaining that we got lucky and the virus was shot by a second gunman on the grassy knoll. 

Seriously, has anyone heard any of these guys admit that, maybe, kinda, their models weren't so useful after all? Nope, it's science but the type where you don't update your theories no matter what happens.

You know, that kind of science. 

Look at the mask mandates. The rules keep tightening and the cases keep going up.... which just proves the rules need to be even tighter. There are literally no results of mask mandates that could not be used to justify further tightening: cases down, it works! Cases up? We need more rules! 

This is not science, it's the literal opposite of science. If your theory stays the same no matter what the results are, you're not actually doing science. 

Honestly, next to these guys even Creationists in Kansas look credible. I mean, have you ever seen an actual, living dinosaur?