Battle Of The Sleazebags

In the political equivalent of the Iran-Iraq war, Labour MP Candy Atherton is embroiled in a dispute with her former aide - or, as the BBC would have it, Cornwall MP Candy Atherton is embroiled in a dispute with her former aide.

Showing a commitment to high-minded ideals worthy of the Dear Leader himself, the Honourable Member is alleged to have asked an aide to find mud to throw at a Tory opponent. Mr Phillips, the now former aide, claims to be shocked - shocked! - that he was asked to dig the dirt on an opponent. What else would a research assistant be doing ?

All this would be funny enough if it only offered an insight into how sleazy Nu Lab really is, but there's more. It turns out that it's not just a sudden attack of high-mindedness that's struck down this individual. What's really teed him off is that he was asked to....no, it's too shocking, it's.... he was asked to investigate a fellow gay man.

Terrible, I know.

Guido says all that need be said about this outbreak of self-dramatising queeny rhectoric. To steal an old line, appropriately enough from Oscar Wilde, you need a heart of stone to read it without laughing.

As far as wider issues go - it's still absurd. Mr Phillips claims that it's unfair to ask a gay man to investigate a gay man (who'd he prefer, Ann Widdicombe ?). OK, then - let's give him that, conditional on reciprocation. No hetrosexuals should have to investiate each other. Ok, mmmmm ?

Somehow, I think not. So - again - all this talk of equality turns out means anything but. Phillips had no qualms about working for a party which could smear a 92 year old woman, regard Sep 11 as a good day to bury bad news, put out an APB on rail safety campaigners it had embraced when they'd served its needs, try to use the Queen Mum's funeral as photo op..... Hell, half of Labour's campaign in 1997 seemed to be based on the Cabinet's sex lives. But, now - now he's developed a moral streak and made the bold step of abandoning his lucrative £10 000 pa job. And the press wants to cast him as Joan of Arc. Puuuuuleaze.

That's yet another thing wrong with all this equality BS - we keep having to listen to losers come out with this kind of self-glorifying drivel.