It's taken years but I've finally found a victim group I qualify for. I can't tell you how thrilled I am to find that employers discrimate against the grossly fat. Of course, this does put Nu Lab in a bind. On the one hand there is the Nanny State, ever ready to arrest people for possession of Category A pizza, on the other we have the Therapy State, every ready to protect people from the entirely predictable and well-deserved consequences of their actions. All we can really be sure of is that I'm a victim and I deserve a government grant.